Signs of the Apocalypse or Small Madnesses?

In the last week, I’ve come across these two photos. I’m still debating their meaning. Are they further signs that the apocalypse is upon us, the U.S. is going to hell in a hand basket, and that modern society is frighteningly out of touch with reality? I’m leaning towards the negative on that. Instead, I think that things like this are great examples of a small but deeply distracted and bored segment of the population. All societies will have their crazies, and these are just some small reminders that we have ours.

First, this from an actual Botox brochure. Don’t ask me where I got it:

Yes, the insanity of Botox is nothing new, but I don’t think I realized how much so until I saw this ad. I understood the desire to eliminate a few forehead wrinkles, but I guess I hadn’t admitted to myself that there are people out there that actually want expressionless faces. Can you imagine trying to express your discontent using the “after” frown? I think you’d have to carry laminated emotion cards around with you so that people would have a clue as to your mood: “You have upset me and I am frowning.” Walter Matthau is rolling in his grave, I assure you.

Second, this ad from Kohler, placed in the New York Times Magazine:

If you can’t read the caption, it says, “Introducing the Purist Hatbox toilet by Kohler.” Yes, that’s a crapper upon which our exploded-hair runway model has perched her hindquarters. This means that not only is she demonstrating exactly how fashionable this toilet is (why, as fashionable as she is, of course), but she is also demonstrating how to use it. I ask you to picture two different scenes:

1. The design/marketing meeting at which this contraption was created: “I’ve got it: a toilet that doesn’t look like a toilet. It looks like…uhhhh…an end table! No, no, a hatbox! Yeah, that’s it! And we put a model on top of it, looking bathroom-sexy! Genius! We’ll all get five-figure bonuses this year!”

2. A midtown-Manhattan party thrown at a locale featuring one of these beauties. Some poor drunken sap is going to have to go and will be unable to determine which high-fashion object in the bathroom is actually the toilet. I’m betting that he pees in the sink.